Everything’s coming up ‘Arry

What a week it’s been for Tottenham manager Harry Redknapp. Last Monday he was staring prison in the face, only to neatly dodge that dicey prospect when he was acquitted on tax evasion charges on Wednesday morning. And before the day was done, things got even better, with Fabio Capello’s hasty departure as England boss bumping ‘Arry up to being the hot favourite to take over the Three Lions. As I wrote in my latest Toro Magazine column, Capello’s exit might not be the worst thing for the England, creating an opportunity to turn crisis into a moment of communicative clarity, and ridding the team of a gaffer whose most oft-worn expression was that of the grumpy old man from the movie ‘Up.’

Still, while it’s been a great few days for ‘Arry, the immediate prospects aren’t necessarily so good for Spurs, who face losing their manager at or before the end of a Premier League season of unparalleled success. His England candidacy comes at a crucial time for Tottenham: this weekend’s match against Newcastle kicks off a stretch that includes matches against the Gooners, United and Chelsea before the end of March, as well as the next rounds of FA Cup encounters. The team persevered throughout the sideshow of ‘Arry’s trial, but watching their wheeler-dealer of a manager dip his toes into the England pool could prove vastly more of a distraction to the Spurs squad.

But Reknapp appears to be in a no-lose situation, much as he was when he first took over at Tottenham. How many times did we hear old ‘Arry give that ‘two points from eight games’ speech about how he brought Spurs back from the brink after a woeful start under Juande Ramos? Now the England opportunity amounts to about the same thing: ‘Arry the White Knight rides in to take over from an unloved foreigner, calms everyone down and, because he’s apparently not the type to give long, boring speeches, just lets the lads go out and play football. Whatever happens on the pitch this summer (and I’m not convinced England will have an easy time with any of Group D opponents France, Sweden and tournament co-hosts Ukraine), Redknapp can say he stepped into the breach when times were tough and did his level best to make things right. Win or lose, he’ll be hailed for his service and can choose whether to step away and go back to Spurs, or stick around and try to lead the charge towards Brazil 2014.

How much has the bar been lowered by the results of his predecessors? Steve McLaren’s squad failed to secure passage to Euro 2008, while Capello’s lethargic Lions wasted no time going south after squeaking into the knockout round in South Africa. Lead England into a semi-final even, and ‘Arry could come home to a parade. Just not down the Tottenham High Road.

Ever the type to play down his profile, all the while talking about himself just a little bit more, ‘Arry claimed he celebrated his acquittal by heading home to spend the evening with his wife and dogs, popped a dose of cold medication, and was in bed by 8:30. He says he’d just as happily ‘head down to Cornwall and never be sighted again.’ Classic ‘Arry that, but I can’t believe he’d turn down a call inviting him to sit front row centre on the England bench against France in their Euro opener on June 11.

It may not be signed, sealed and delivered just yet, but everything is on the table right now for ‘Arry and the FA, and nothing’s off it. They have a need, and he’s got the momentum of a tsunami behind him. ‘Arry’s no wheeler dealer, of course, so he’d probably tell you he’s not the type to put a tenner on his chances. Too bad. Right now, he looks about as sure a bet as could possibly be.

Ian Harrison

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Liverpool on the Edge

Kenny welcomes back his prodigal hijo..

Two-thirds into the season, the jury is still out on Liverpool. Has the storied club moved one step closer to its former exalted position? Or does Kenny Dalglish have his team running to stand still while other clubs leapfrog over the fallen giants?

One of the clubs on the rise is Tottenham Hotspur.  “Wheeler-Dealer” ‘Arry Redknapp has built a team that sits in third place, and — along with Manchester City — has displaced long-time Top 4 residents Chelsea and Arsenal.   It is hard not to see them in the group stages of the Champions League come September, but there are no guarantees.  Meanwhile, five points separate four teams for the last CL spot.  So today’s game at Anfield may be rich with meaning and consequence for both sides.

But where are the Reds exactly? They have reached one cup final, and have bested a mighty rival to progress in another.  The club has stated that its goal is Champions League football… but they have to go through the aforementioned Chelsea and Arsenal, as well as fight off the football renaissance going on in the country’s Northeast.  Newcastle were supposed to collapse after the £35 million sale of Andy Carroll to the Reds, and the defection of Kevin Nolan to play for his old boss, Sam Allardyce.  But in a case of addition through subtraction (and the smart pickup of Demba Ba), the Magpies are keeping pace.  Meanwhile, Martin O’Neill is weaving that Ol’ Black Magic with the Black Cats: Sunderland are 8-2-3 under the Irishman.

In hope of making sense of  Liverpool’s season, let’s look at the numbers.

- Liverpool have six more points than this time last year.  But in comparable games played, they are -1.  In other words, when you take all the matches they’ve played this year and compared them to the games from last year against the same teams, they are behind.

- The Reds’ record against Top 10 teams is trending to be about the same (just better than 50%), but they have improved against the lower half.

- Their away record has improved significantly, while their home record is worse.  Liverpool have yet to lose at Anfield this year, but they have frustrated fans by drawing a league-leading seven times at home.

- Liverpool’s goal difference is +7 compared to 0 at this time last year.  But they have scored three fewer goals.  A year ago the ranked fifth in offence, sixth in defence.  This year, they are one of the stingiest sides in the Prem, but are 12th in goals scored.  Fulham, Villa and Blackburn have all scored more than the Reds.

And therein lies the problem.   After spending over £100m on players like Andy Carroll, Jordan Henderson, Charlie Adam and Luis Suarez, the offence has gone backwards.  Carroll and Henderson are young players wilting under the pressure and excessive price tags. Charlie Adam seems to have been a big fish in Blackpool’s small pond.  And Suarez has been dubious in both play and disposition, letting shots go errant while embroiling himself in several controversies.

However, there appear to be several lights in the fog.  A player who is no stranger to discipline problems himself, Craig Bellamy seems to have been settled down by Dalglish, his boyhood idol. He now leads the team in scoring… not bad for a player who’s started half the games on the bench.  Jose Enrique — another wantaway from St. James’ Park — has admirably filled the long-time void at left back, and may be the team’s Player of the Year.

Is it enough?  Spurs have amassed a midfield and defence that are as good as any in the league, and snapping up Brad Friedel in the supposed twilight of his career looks like a stroke of genius.  But Liverpool have yet to lose at Anfield this season.  The talismanic Steven Gerrard will be in the line-up, and Suarez returns after his long stay in the corner, hopefully with something to prove.

If they win the Carling Cup (likely), win the FA Cup (maybe) but don’t reach the Champions League, will this have been a successful season? Or will Kenny have to take a long, hard look in the mirror and decide whether he’s the man to lead his team back to the promised land?  Tonight’s game may go a long way to answering those questions.

My prediction: 2-2.

Brent Lanthier

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Mad times in Manchester

Sure, Barca are the best is the business. But the way I see it, Manchester is the first city of European football.

Of course, that doesn’t mean both United and City aren’t in danger of dropping out of the Champions League once the group stages conclude next month.

In this week’s Toro Magazine column, I explain why the Citizens are surely Europa League-bound, while Fergie’s lot will likely find a way through…again.

Ian Harrison

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Beckham’s future? Bet on France

After he trained with Tottenham last winter, I suspected David Beckham might wind up with Spurs once his LA Galaxy days came to an end when the MLS year ends next month. Now I’m not so certain. In my Toro Magazine column this week, I peg newly-wealthy Paris Saint-Germain as the likely club to land Becks.

If Beckham doesn’t come to Tottenham, it’s not a major loss. There’s no need for Spurs to overpay for a 36 year old winger who would really only be a luxury addition to the squad, no matter how much experience and savvy he might bring (or how much Rafael van der Vaart moans about playing out wide).

The Galaxy may miss Beckham a bit more, although they’ve always got Robbie Keane, and his lovely lady, to brighten up life in La La Land.

Ian Harrison

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Between Messi and immortality, a world of pain

As the undisputed king of football, Leo Messi has already secured his place in the game’s history. La Liga champion? Check. Copa del Rey winner? Check. Champions League winner? Check. European Footballer of the Year? Been there. FIFA World Player of the Year? Done that.

But all the accolades don’t seem to be enough for some pundits to consider Messi to be the greatest of all time. The critics argue Messi isn’t Messi without his Barcelona buddies by his side. Put on the Albicelestes colours and his magic disappears. To be the best, they argue, requires winning the one trophy that has been held above all others – the FIFA World Cup. Win that, Leo, and the debate will be over.

His quest begins again this Saturday, when South America kicks off qualifiers for Brazil 2014. And make no mistake: if Messi is to be a World Cup winner, getting there won’t be easy. The CONMEBOL qualification tournament is regarded as the toughest in the world, agrueling three-year cycle in which every South American team competes in home and home round robin tournament. The top four automatically qualify, with the fifth place team going to a playoff round against an Asian team. There are no easy matches in South American qualifying anymore, no Faroe Islands, Maldives, or St. Lucia’s to beat up on. Every match is war.

Don’t believe me? Check out the semi-finalists from this year’s Copa America: Uruguay, Paraguay, Peru, and Venezuela. No Argentina, nNo Brazil… and no gimmes. Every game will be tight, physical and challenging. At the end of a South American qualifier, the players look as if they were in a rugby match, not a football match.

For any player, the World Cup is the ultimate prize. To win it as an Argentine in Brazil would be even sweeter. For Lionel Messi to lift the trophy, he will have to go through football hell. That is the high price of immortality.

Hadi Zogheib

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The Mansfield Minx is getting married!

From the ‘Least Surprising News in Football & the World’ Dep’t, we bring you this joyous gem, an update to our earlier post about Mansfield Town’s shagtastic CEO/former call girl Carolyn Still, as delivered by The Daily Mail:

“The youngest woman to become the top boss of an English football club has got engaged – to the man who gave her the job just two weeks ago.

Glamorous Mansfield Town chief executive Carolyn Still, 29, is reportedly set to marry the chairman of the club, John Radford, 45, next year. 

When he made the hire, Radford would not confirm he and Still were a couple and said her appointment had nothing to do with their friendship.

However, a spokesperson for the club has now confirmed they were an item before Radford made her boss of the Nottinghamshire club.

The happy couple announced their engagement to friends and family at the weekend, after Radford proposed last week.”

So, how will the couple’s nuptials come out? We’re guessing she wants it to be like this, and he just wants it like this.

Ian Harrison

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Clubs Battle Back from the Ashes

As in other sports, the cliché of a “Cinderella story” can sometimes be irresistible to both football writers and fans alike.  It’s not just the play on the pitch and the final that bewitches us so… it is the human stories behind the matches, and our ability to relate to them.  As a fan, you feel good when your team comes from the brink to do well; it affirms your choice to support your club.  Likewise, the mourning that you feel when your club loses — or, heaven forbid, collapses — still allows you to feel part of something.  You share your pain with those who wear the same shirts and scarves.

Last week, I was sent an e-mail from one of my best friends, a Chester City fan who had to endure the ignominy of his team going into administration and then folding into oblivion.  In the note was a link to a mini-documentary done by the Guardian’s John Harris (see above).  He covers a battle between two clubs owned by fans who took matters into their own hands.  Chester FC was born out of the ashes of City’s demise… while FC United was formed by Mancunians fed up with the Red Devils’ American owners, who downloaded massive amounts of debt onto the club.  Both neophyte clubs are competing in the Evo-Stick Northern Premier League, the seventh tier of English football.

The piece shows the fans’ pride as they realize the fruits of their efforts to start the new clubs  (I also thought it was cool that you can have a pint with the players after the game).  Team representatives are realistic; they know their supporters will always be split in their loyalties between the small club and their favourite Premier League side (in the case of the Chester fans, it appears to be Liverpool).  But like any business, you tend to care more when it’s your name on the charter… and your money is at stake.

Of course, the ur-fan-based club in England is AFC Wimbledon, which came about after their original side — Wimbledon FC — was abruptly moved an hour north and renamed Milton Keyes Dons.  AFC has since climbed into the ranks of professional football and competes in League Two this season.

So in the spirit of supporting the underdog, I will provide regular updates on these three sides throughout the season.  Will they continue their rise through the ranks of English football? Or will the economics of the game finally catch up to them, weighing them down so they can’t rise through the surface of professional football?

You may not care about lower-tier football… but you have to admire these supporters’ pluck.

As of Monday, September 26, 2011:

AFC Wimbledon – 2-1 @ Bradford City — 7th (playoff zone) in League Two

Chester FC – 3-0 @ Stafford Rangers — 3rd (playoff zone) in Northern Premier League

FC United of Manchester – 5-3 @ Burscough — 9th in Northern Premier League

Brent Lanthier

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Another banner moment for Diego

You know Diego Maradona, and might well loathe him, for his infamous ‘Hand of God.’ Now the Argentinian has offered up a new appendage for abomination; his ‘Flying Foot of Fury.

Dirty Diego couldn’t contain his rage when a fan of UAE club Al Wasl kept pushing up a banner to catch a glimpse of the legendary striker, who recently signed a two-year,  7-million Euro contract to coach the Middle East outfit. Seems there was a bit of a communication problem, as the chubby coach wanted the sign kept down so he could have a photo taken next to it. The solution? Maradona mashed the man’s hand with a blinding left boot. From The Telegraph:

“The banner, sent to him by his daughters Delma and Giannina, read: ‘Babu Estoy con vos te amo –Benja,’ meaning ‘Grandfather I love you and I am with you’ and was signed by his grandson Benjamin.

Maradona later apologised to the Al Wasl supporter.

“I am emotional, this is my nature. I’ve always been like this as a player and coach. Sometimes I feel like I’m a player of Al Wasl.

“The sign was a message from my grandson and daughters in Manchester and Argentina and it means they support me in whatever I do. I apologise to the fan I hurt but I wanted the banner to be seen.”

Maradona went on to register his first competitive victory as coach with the Dubai club with a 3-0 home win over Emirates in the Etisalat Cup.”

Oh, Diego. You dozey dolt. This is the dumbest thing you’ve done since…well, since two days ago, when you told fans who might be “scared” after you lost two of your first three matches to “stay at home, watch some DVD or some comedy series.” As The Guardian suggested, “a dramatization of the Argentinian legend’s managerial career would fit the bill.” I think we just got a new episode.

Ian Harrison

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Inter Tinkers with their Manager… Again

Gasperini: Don't look back in anger

It took five matches for Internazionale to fire Gian Piero Gasperini… the fifth manager to leave the club in three years.  But only in the world of sport does a organization hire its leaders from a steady pool of failures.

The rumours are that Claudio “The Tinkerman” Ranieri has been given a two-year contract to take over from Gasperini.  No stranger to football’s revolving door, Ranieri has managed 10 teams over the last 20 years; this will be his seventh Serie A club. In that time, he has only won two major trophies: a Coppa Italia with Fiorentina… and a Copa del Rey with Valencia.  Yet this is the man who has allegedly been chosen to lead one of the biggest clubs in the world.

Inter fans and management must be perturbed that their recent domination of Italian football has come to a jarring and screeching halt.  Long known as “the other Milanese club”, i Nerazzurri shook off its inferiority complex by winning five consecutive Serie A titles under Roberto Mancini and José Mourinho, topping off the run by winning the quadruple: the league title, the Coppa Italia, the Supercoppa, as well as being crowned both European and world champions… defeating mighty Barcelona along the way.  Life was good for Inter Milan. Then Rafael Benitez arrived.

Rafageddon unleashed again

Sure, Rafa led them to a World Club Championship. But they did it by beating club teams from South Korea and the Congo… one of the poorest nations in the world.  Not so fast, cry Inter fans.  They beat the world’s best to get there.  But Rafa’s infernal reputation of maniacal stubbornness is well deserved, and it didn’t sit well with the club’s superstars.  By Christmas, Inter would be down by 11 points from their San Siro rivals and Benitez was shown the door.  He has yet to manage in a single match since.

While not a bad choice, the Spaniard’s replacement was perhaps difficult for Inter fans to accept.  Not only did Leonardo play over a hundred matches for hated AC… he was also part of the Brazilian team that beat Italy at the Rose Bowl in 1994.  No matter: the new gaffer lead Inter on a run that pulled them to the brink of another championship.  But in the end, the club failed to defend the league, and were laughed out of Europe by a mediocre German side. While Inter managed to hold onto the Coppa, the writing was on the wall.  Leonardo left Italy for the bright lights — and a big pay cheque — in Paris.

Enter Gasparini and an immediate cloud of suspicion. Rumours abounded that the former Genoa gaffer was only chosen because others refused the job.  Fabio Capello is still under contract to the England FA.  Young Andres Villas-Boas snapped at the chance to manage Cha-ching! Chelsea, after only one season at Porto.  Even Marcelo Bielsa followed up Chile’s impressive display at last year’s World Cup by signing up to manage the Spanish powerhouse… of Athletic Bilbao.

It all must have been secretly humiliating for owner Massimo Moratti.  If it was, it only got worse as the season got underway.  After succumbing to their hated rivals in the SuperCoppa, Inter emerged from the one-week players’ strike to lose to up-and-coming Palermo… one of the teams leading a Southern renaissance in Italian football.  That was followed by a CL league loss (at home!) to Turkish side Trabzonspor, who weren’t even supposed to be there.  A draw against Roma might have been acceptable, if it was not for a humiliating defeat Tuesday night to newly-promoted Novara.  Gasperini uscita… Ranieri entri.

Zanetti: Is it exit time for Inter's Iron Man?

There are some — including the Guardian’s Jonathan Wilson — who argue that Moretti should never have hired Gasperini… not because he is a bad manager, but because his system doesn’t gel with Inter’s squad.  Gasperini favours variations of 3-4-3.  But at Inter, that meant using an ancient back-five of Samuel, Lucio, Maicon, Cambiasso and Zanetti as defensive anchors (the average age of the South Americans is 33).  Gasperini let his fullbacks roam just behind the wingers, and the aforementioned central players like to play up-field…. leaving Inter vulnerable on the counter.  Consequently, ball after ball has gone sailing over the heads of the defenders, with only an increasingly erratic Julio Cesar to stop it.

Offensively, the club is only marginally better off.  The “Will He Leave, Won’t He Leave” speculation surrounding Wesley Sneijder had to have been a distraction, considering the Dutchman’s pivotal role in the formation.  Plus, the fiasco signing of cup-tied Diego Forlan from Atletico Madrid is unforgivable.  If you believe in omens, it does not portend well for The Big Grass Snake.

Obviously, the scudetto is still too young to start picking out trends.  But with non-traditional leaders like Palermo, Napoli, Fiorentina and Udinese continuing where they left off last season, Inter may have to look deep within itself and try to decide what it needs to do to turn itself around.  Ranieri will likely perturb players with his constant manipulation of the side, not unlike Benitez.  We will see if The Tinkerman soothes or chafes raw egos at the club.

From my perspective, Inter fans can take solace in two things:

1) Super Sneijder and Forlan seem to be developing an understanding, despite the recent run of form.  Both players were magnificent in South Africa, with Forlan leading what could be considered South America’s new powerhouse.  If they can get service, look out.

2) AC Milan is only playing marginally better, stealing a draw last week against Barcelona in the CL.  Italy’s axis of power may be shifting.

Brent Lanthier

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Mansfield Minx is shaggadelic, baby!

Like most red-blooded males, we sat up and took notice last week when Mansfield Town made 29-year-old  Carolyn Still the youngest chief executive in English football. We’re bound to be a bit interested when the new bum in the director’s seat comes with these kinds of curves. In the lightly contested field of sexy female sports executives, Still crushes the Wicked Witch of West Ham into a putrid pulp and beats the balls off Jeannie Buss.

With this blonde beauty in charge, the Stags will surely have no trouble waking up their sleeping fan base, as the sultry Still has promised to do. Most supporters, I’m sure, will delightedly dream about waking up next to this lovely lass…gently rubbing her lovely (Ed.  Stop it, stop it! This rhyme is despicable!! This is a family-oriented blog with value… oh, ‘allo love, what’ s your name?) …  but I digress.

Still joined the Stags after working in the fashion industry for Bulgari and Gucci. And despite rumours of a romantic relationship with team owner John Radford, she insists her appointment was genuine.

That’s all well and good. The question is, before the 45-year-old Radford started ravaging her, how many other men were having a cuddle with Still’s buxom bum? Seems she was an employee of two escort agencies, (including the one patronized by Messers. Five-at-a-time Cristiano Ronaldo & Anderson) entertaining clients day and night.

My, oh my! Phwoar! That adds some extra spice to this steamy appointment. Wake up, sleepy Mansfield. There’s a Minx in your midst.

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